It was pointed out to me recently that Jeff Little has written a book....something about pastoring being "worth it."
It did occur to me to ask if Pastor Jeff has ever asked any of the people that he has injured if they felt it was "worth it." I am not sure where I stand on that.
"Worth it?" Hmmm...yeah, I guess so. I probably needed my experience at Milestone Church to kick me in the booty about not trying to find people to parent me but just get busy parenting myself. I probably needed it to figure out what I truly believe about God, church and people. So, yeah, I guess it was "worth it."
But that's not really the point here. The point is that when I was delivered this news I thought to myself, "Gosh, I could really write an Amazon review on this whole "worth it" concept and put some things out there to a national audience about Pastor Jeff, Milestone, et al." But, hey, I'd had a margarita that afternoon. I wasn't thinking clearly.
When my mind became less dissipated, I realized, "Who really gives a sh*t?" Who cares if Jeff Little writes a book? I mean, we are talking about somebody who purports to be a spiritual leader and even a spiritual "father" but doesn't seem to understand the importance of humility, repentance, etc. One of my oft quoted lines is, "People are their own reward and their cross to bear." It's true. For all of us.
So, although I am choosing to write a blog post about it, I'll not be commenting on Amazon or anywhere else about this bit of wisdom penned by my former pastor. The good news is that I'm at this place. I'm at the place of, "Well, whatever. My life has gone on and I'm doing very well."
And if you've suffered pain at the hands of other people claiming to be your spiritual "parents," if you have been hurt by your own controlling/cult church experience, I assure you that you can get to this place, too.
Clearly, I'm still working on ultimate forgiveness (which I say is wishing people well and hoping they prosper). But I'm confident this is a step in the right direction. Choosing not to say things on a major forum that I could. Choosing to let sleeping dogs lie. Choosing to recognize that a life well lived is its own reward (and a life lived poorly is as well). My job, in order to live MY best life, is to keep working to that place of ultimate forgiveness....which I'm confident is on its way.
